Off the Top of my Head

I snapped...or rather, snipped

Photo by Michael Dagonakis on Unsplash

Saturday August 30, 2025

It happened. the Black Books Dave’s Syndrome (see previous post) hit me yesterday at only 82℉ in my bedroom. My window coverings were not sufficing, I couldn’t sit still, it was too headachey bright to go outside and the air was muggy and gross. A neighbor kid had a howling fit and I had to shut the living room fresh air window to cut the noise. I was grinding my teeth so much I thought sparks might fly out. My hip length potential Only Fans hair suddenly felt like a mink coat thrown over my head hurting my neck and weighing me down. I’d let myself become Cousin It since lockdown, just occasionally trimming the ends.

I’ve wanted to get back to my curly layers, but the thought of spending $100, driving 40 mins to the salon, wrecking my neck at the sink, sitting wet-headedly still, using the public restroom, having someone's face close to mine with my autoimmunity, only to end up with more length taken off than I wanted, was met with a reverberant inner NOPE.

I grabbed the little gold scissors I just bought that were intended for my Howard Moon stationery village, not the home beauty parlor. I’d watched some DIY YouTube haircut videos so I had an idea of what to do. I’ve actually been hacking at my own hair when the mood strikes since I was 15. My first DIY haircut was a Sinead O’Connor. I wanted to scare boys. Unfortunately, my scary head was attractive to scary boys. I’ve never cut layers from this length. Risky. Oh well, I’ve got hats.

Photo by Anton Chubarov on Unsplash

I can’t make the description of the snippy proceedings compelling. I wish I’d taken a before pic, but all you need for a visual is: The Ring

Sunday Aug 31

Well I ended up with more length taken off than I wanted, but I’ve only myself to blame. So here I sit in my 2011 Tori Amos tour t-shirt with my 2013 Alt-J tour t-shirt wrapped around my .5 lbs reduced wet hair keeping me cool. It was worth it. Like Sabrina the Teenage Witch told her friend Jenny after a dodgy curly chop,

“Hair Grows!”

Earlier today, I decided to take my new haircut and sunny disposish out for a spin. I headed to the grocery store at 8:30 am with a “real feel” temp of 84℉, fighting Dave’s Syndrome. I usually bundle up like Glenn Gould even on warm days, but I decided to expose some skin for Vitamin D action. Rather than shopping hurriedly, I took my time checking sun screen deals and enjoying the store’s air conditioning. I accidentally squirted sunscreen on my shirt while checking for a seal and leapt back in surprise. I imagined security replaying the footage for a laugh.

A sporty looking lady in self-checkout was buying several bunches of flowers including a vivid assortment of my favorites, Gerbera daisies. I heard Stars Hollow’s Babette’s scratchy voice saying, “Pow! Color comin’ outta yer yin-yang!” She dropped a bunch of fresh baby’s breath on her way out and didn’t notice. I stopped my self-checkouting, grabbed them and had to jog to catch up with her quick gym stride. I hate being called and calling people “ma’am”, but I never think of anything else in the moment. She gave me a very expressive “Thank You!” which was nice. Sometimes people act like you’re bothering them when you offer help.

Sunny Disposish: 1 Dave: 0

Photo by Natalie Kinnear on Unsplash

On my way out, my heart ached to see a young father, not from this country, and toddler daughter seated on the ground by the shopping carts with a sign saying, “help with rent, food, Pampers’. “I’ll be right back!” I said, as I hurried my cart to the car. “God bless you!” he called after me.

I went back and asked what size they needed. His eyes were red and he kept bringing his prayer hands together and saying, “Thank you, God bless you.” I headed to the dreaded baby aisle. I have never bought baby diapers in my life. It took me a while to locate a hidden pack of size 2 Pampers on the top shelf, knocking the size 4 that was blocking it to the floor. I imagined puzzled security staff, already comically relieved by my sunscreen mishap, watching CCTV of the weird always-alone lady who usually dresses like The Invisible Man and only buys 5 types of food, suddenly fumbling with diapers with her shins showing.

After seeing that young weary father and little girl nibbling crackers in the heat, I’ll go ahead and shut up about the weather while sitting at home with my essentials stocked, sheltered by a home that is financially secured and not on fire.

As I left the store, I saw another young father with 2 tots making his way with a full bag of groceries to his car. I felt a wave of despair at the thought of families being separated, persecuted or otherwise struggling in this alleged “life, liberty and pursuit of happiness” land. I’d say I can’t believe what’s become of this country and world, but my view of humanity has always been dim. A sunny disposition can only do so much, but I’ll certainly be more appreciative of the ways in which I’m not struggling, even if I’m not exactly thriving.

I think my hot head is already cooling down.

Dave defeated, sunny disposish for the win🌞